Lately things have been bad. Like really bad.
I have felt more distant than ever.
Everyone is just abandoning me. People are putting me last and forgetting I exist.
It's so hard seeing all these people laughing and hanging out when I just feel like I don't belong with anyone. I'm not good enough, or people can't get enough out of me so they don't bother. Or maybe its them, because I get too salty and the truth is shitty sometimes.
But its probably me.
I watch everyone do all this great stuff that I just don't have time for because I'm always working or preparing for work.
If I have acted poorly towards you I am so sorry. But I am just done bothering with people who don't care about me. Plain and simple.
I have been crying or at least watery eyed for the past 2 weeks and it sucks. Every little thing makes me cry.
I'm just so overwhelmed. Between trying to impress my job (which I'm currently miserably failing at), trying to go to the gym, trying to balance the occasional "Come see your brother", being with someone who has given up on me, and not sleeping have really had an adverse effect on me. People give me attitude and I just snap because I feel like I'm being backed into a corner and there is nothing I can do about it .
I am not in control of anything in my life.
But everything always manages to be my fault.
Go figure.
I have felt more distant than ever.
Everyone is just abandoning me. People are putting me last and forgetting I exist.
It's so hard seeing all these people laughing and hanging out when I just feel like I don't belong with anyone. I'm not good enough, or people can't get enough out of me so they don't bother. Or maybe its them, because I get too salty and the truth is shitty sometimes.
But its probably me.
I watch everyone do all this great stuff that I just don't have time for because I'm always working or preparing for work.
If I have acted poorly towards you I am so sorry. But I am just done bothering with people who don't care about me. Plain and simple.
I have been crying or at least watery eyed for the past 2 weeks and it sucks. Every little thing makes me cry.
I'm just so overwhelmed. Between trying to impress my job (which I'm currently miserably failing at), trying to go to the gym, trying to balance the occasional "Come see your brother", being with someone who has given up on me, and not sleeping have really had an adverse effect on me. People give me attitude and I just snap because I feel like I'm being backed into a corner and there is nothing I can do about it .
I am not in control of anything in my life.
But everything always manages to be my fault.
Go figure.
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