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Sometimes I wonder...

If I even exist. I know my thoughts are real.
I know what I eat or drink is real.
Sometimes I get phantom tastes while eating, or smells when walking.
Sometimes I hear people call my name or just shout and there isn't anyone talking to me.
I feel like my skin is just so itchy all the time that I could scratch it off.
Sometimes people make noises and they aren't always intentional but they still drive me CRAZY and I feel like I'm going to loose my mind and spill any bit of sense left in my head out.
Sometimes I just get so angry and overwhelmed with emotion. Like my whole body gets hot and my blood boils and I begin to feel queasy.
But am I ever really there?
I manage to always disappear.
Become invisible.
Not exist.
But at the same time I do want this a lot. I love silence and no priorities of anyone but me.
But I guess that is selfish too.

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