It's been awhile.

 Therapy, meds, nothing is different the usual.

Got bit by a dog, have hole in my shoe, can't jump for long, or stand on it for too long. Still bruised to high hell. And I didn't want to sue because it is the owner not the dog. But it isn't worth it. And these people are sketchy as fuck. 
But I should have. I am in constant pain. Amoxicillin gave me so much itch and so much rash. 
I started going back to the gym and it's fucking hard.
Joey and I cannot fucking find apartments and I don't really want to move to Mass, but I don't want to stay in RI forever either, nor do I want him to move from his job.
My job is a joke. I am not getting paid, basically on call, but working VERY part time because of the hours needed. And they tried to fuck me on taxes.
So basically my life has been one big fucking joke since honestly too long.
I am so tired of fighting to live.
If I want to kill myself I am selfish and horrible.
If I want to kill myself the world goes "OH NO PLEASE DON'T YOU HAVE SO MUCH TO LIVE FOR."
The world I live for doesn't want to help me live. I have to pay so much to eat, we have to pay landlords to not do shit, I pay all this money for basic things to keep me alive, and NO ONE HELPS so what the fuck do I have to live for?
All work and no play makes Adrianna a dull ghoul.
All work and no play makes Adrianna a dull ghoul.
All work and no play makes Adrianna a dull ghoul.
All work and no play makes Adrianna a dull ghoul.
All work and no play makes Adrianna a dull ghoul.
All work and no play makes Adrianna a dull ghoul. 
All work and no play makes Adrianna a dull ghoul.