IAmAdrianna

Damned if I don't. I feel like no matter what I can't do this. The amount of compromise isn't worth it. It really isn't. I have lived with to many people for too long. And now I got used to living with one. I don't want to go back to fighting for the bathroom and having to share space with everyone. I am going to have to move and get rid of so many things. I don't know what to do with any of it. I feel like I have to give up performing at this rate to get rid of some stuff. But all my kitchen ware and stuff like I really have to store my things that I spent all this money on?? This sucks. And I just wish that something good could just happen for a change...

When you're always being ditched. Second best none the less. But I will never get used to it. I will never get over the decline of excitement. The anxiety after all that waiting. The pent up excitement that drills me down into myself. Deeper and deeper until you're hollow with sadness and regret for trying.

After everything he has taken from me. Because I was "mean" when HE never talked. Face to face, notebooks you name it. Any time there was a problem he would talk to another girl. EVERY TIME. And they NEVER bit back because he was taken. But some people have absolutely no respect or regard for any one but themselves. And then they tell you they aren't interested any more and that he is a COWARD. And you talk to me, every day acting like we are on okay terms. And then I notice you haven't stopped talking to him. And I ask him " So does this mean we are broken up?" and he asked "Can I give you a hug". ARE YOU KIDDING ME. Now this. You take my cat. We raised her. But you don't deserve her. You never once talked to me about anything ever. Only when it came out in an argument. Your mother KILLED Natasha's sister by closing her in a door. Petey and Jasper go outside and come back with ticks on them. As does dog. Buster has ear mites again, you kn...

Bother. I'm a fucking spaz that gives 200% of myself to people that barely care about themselves.

Inebriate Numb Forget the feelings They are gone Disappointment Just annoying Wish I could fast forward This is dumb Fucking dumb Like a nightmare I can't wake up from I'm so cold, so alone This house once was my home Restart Time to restart Feeling strong Feelings strong There is hope Hope for another A chance, A real chance of  Feeling so special It's only fair Don't I deserve it? It's really easy to see It's worth it

I don't want him to be here anymore. I want to have my own life. And I feel like everytime I try, it gets ruined.